Tiffany Page
21.01.10
Labelled as a "Fender-wielding Chrissie Hynde for the 21st century" by Q magazine, Hesaidshesaid thought they better jump on the Thames link and check out this 23 year old rock chick. She's about to start a tour with The Noisettes and we can never resist a chance to catch a spanking new artist just before those tables turn.
http://www.myspace.com/tiffanypage
He Said
I met her at Camden Road overground station and true to form we got there just in time to see the train pull away, cue an inevitably awkward 20 minute conversation:
Her - "Do you know what I hate?"
Me - "Xmas weight?" (I had an idea)
Her - "Boys like you" (Correct)
You see since starting the blog I have been held accountable for the wrong doings and illicit screwing of many a man, forced to make excuses for the foul and intolerable actions that are only ever four pints of premium lager away (and yes dear ex-girlfriend I include myself in this tribe). To be fair to her she does get fucked around more than a bimbo at a Chelsea bash but she does have a habit of picking the wrong ones (originally I wanted to name the pin dicked prick in this part of the review but she has more dignity than that twat and convinced me not to, but trust me he is tosser).
When we get to the gig I gag on the smell of Topshop and hairspray, this does not bode well. Feeling a little out of place and with my finger tip skin starting to crawl it is with not little relief that Tiffany Page walks onto the stage... But not till her backing band do... Who I have to say are three of the most uninspiring insipid penguins I have every seen waddle onto a stage. I think they are here to build tension but it's hard to tell really because all this fart arsing around builds as much tension as a badly made blamange.
Lets not attempt to hide nor disguise this is a very attractive person, a fact not lost on me or indeed her slightly pervy drummer who seems to be enjoying his view from behind far more than the people out front. To matters less carnal and more musical now. It is with no small twinge of regret that I have to report a disappointment. Tiffany is not without talent. Her songs lyrics if sometimes clunky do convey real emotion. Her single 'Walk away' is the stand out track for my money. Where she offers a husky delivery to a sweet pop melody. But If we are to compare her all albeit wrongly to the current female singing crop its hard to tell where she stands out. Without doubt she has a future, but on tonights showing it will be some time (and maybe experience) before we see her true talents. Although that being said I would find her vomit more appealing than Taylor Swift.
If you want to know what watching Tiffany Page is like... Well its like watching Miley Cyrus give her first blow job, all sultry looks and hair tosses but all it really amounts to is a robotic jerky like motion leading to a disappointing climax.
She Said
Flicking through the blog the other day and obsessively looking at the web statistics (it's horribly addictive - but good to know about the large Bulgarian following we seem to have mounted), it occurred to me that we actually hadn't written about any female artists yet. I hadn't even noticed... I mean, I know I get distracted easily by boys, but there is no excuse for this. There has been an influx of female talent in this country, my personal faves are Florence and Adele and I wanted to see if Tiff here was about to join ranks.
We'd been to The Garage on Highbury Corner a few weeks before to see Delphic but neglected to actually write anything. Not because they weren't good (they were brilliant) but just cos' we are so ridiculously unorganised that by the time we pulled our fingers out we couldn't actually remember much about the evening and didn't want to bore you.
Anyway back to the night in hand. I was really looking forward to this gig and hoping I'd walk away with a massive girl crush. He was wearing a very odd concoction of clothing. He looked a bit like he'd just got off the tennis court and was about to go meet Peter at the library before heading back to the sorority house to play poker and then gang bang some inebriated unsuspecting freshers and then tell everyone the next day they are complete sluts and ruin the next four years of their lives and laugh about it.
Sorry... So I wasn't disappointed. There is something utterly approachable about her, half way through when the hot lights got a bit much she reluctantly took her hoody off proclaiming "Sorry I really wanted to keep this on cos I wore this dress last time I played here" (blushing). Obviously a bit of a tomboy and very tiny, but then she sings, pulls out a guitar she really comes to life. I didn't want to imagine what was going on in his head as he watched her flip and shake her unkempt hair and clutch at the mic, pulling it close to her moist lips - yeah I've read a few Mills and Boon in my time.
She grew up listening to grunge and you can defiantly hear the Nirvana influences come out in songs like "On your Head"... I kind of liken her to a young rocky Cheryl Crow or Alanis Morrisette. Although I like her style and think she's really talented I just wonder if the competition for the "Chick of the Charts" is too stiff this year...
